Memories of the Heart
by milkywaymidnight
Summary: In responce to a LJ kinkmeme prompt.FullInfoInside.AU.Post-1stClass.Erik stays with the children and Charles.But Charles erased all their memories of himself when they left him at the hospital the first time.This story is set after that.C/E
1. Something missing

**Memories of the Heart**

**Summary:** AU. Post-1stClass. Erik stays with the children and Charles. But Charles erased all their memories of himself when they left him at the hospital the first time. This story is set after that.

**Warning/Disclaimer**:Warning for slash, maybe some violence, mild swearing, possible ooc-ness, since I'm still pretty new to the fandom and mild adult concepts. I own nothing. If I did, well there would've been at least one Charles/Erik kiss in the movie. Sigh. No money will be made from this.

**A/N**:So I start yet another freekin' Charles/Erik story. In responce to this kink meme prompt from livejournal round nine:Charles erases himself from others memories.

_**For whatever reason (Charles wants out, Charles is dying, etc), Charles decides to leave everything behind. He surreptitiously gauges the opinions of others (would you rather be hurt or blissfully ignorant? etc), and comes to the conclusion that it would be better if he seemingly never existed.**_

_**He erases everyone's memories of him and leaves.**_

_**The erase isn't completely clean for Erik, though, and he feels Charles' absence and subconsciously searches for him. He eventually recovers his memories.**_

_**What happens after is up to anon (He tries to convince everyone else that Charles existed? He finds Charles? Charles wiped his own mind? Charles is gone? Erik runs away with Charles?)**_

_**Can be pre or post divorce or AU with powers. I just want lots of angst, though it can end sad or happy.**_

**Chapter One: **Something missing

'_I want you by my side. We both want the same thing.'_

_'Oh my friend, I'm sorry. But we do not.' _

_Charles eyes fall shut and body goes limp in his arms._

Erik wakes up, gasping for breath and is drenched in his own sweat. He falls back down, running his hand down his face. He turns his head towards the window and stares outside. It is still dark out, but the light of dawn slowly leaks its way through and Erik feels it inside:The lonliness, the emptiness of his heart. He feels there is a vital part of himself missing and those dreams that he just knows are more than just dreams, only helps to confirm his suspicion. But it's all so vague and is already slipping from his memory. Why the hell can't he remember fully?

Knowing that he wasn't going to get back to sleep, he pushes himself out of bed, getting dressed for the day. After he was dressed in the usual black leather pants and black turtleneck sweater, he makes his way downstairs. He stops, suddenly finding himself in the study room and eyes the chess set on the table. He makes his way over to it and reaches out, hovering his hand over it.

_'I am not your peace.'_

_'Peace was never an option.'_

He remembers the words so clearly in his head right then, but then they begin to fade into the blackness. He sits down in the chair that he couldn't help but feel he had used often before and stares at the empty seat in front of him. He imagines a handsome face and stunning blue eyes gazing fondly back at him.

He feels like he's drowning.

After awhile of just sitting there and staring at the empty chair, Erik pushes himself out of his own and exits the study. He then makes his way to the kitchen and starts the coffee. After the coffee is made, he pours himself a cup.

'_There's so much more to you than you know. Not just pain and anger. I've felt it.' _

He drops the cup and curses as some of the steaming hot liquid splashes on his hand. He holds it against his chest with the other, shaking his head. '_This was getting ridiculess.'_ He has to get a hold of himself.

"Erik?" He looks up and sees Raven making her way over to him, eyeing his hurt hand with concern. He sighs.

"I'm fine," he snaps a little. She shakes her head at him, reaching out for his injured hand and looks sadly down at it. She pulls him over to the sink, placing his hand under the tap and starts running the cold water over it. He winces as the water makes contact with the slightly burnt skin. But after a few seconds, it doesn't sting too much. "Thanks," he says, pulliing back his hand that's starting to blister just a tiny bit. She just smiles at him and Erik feel such a great sense of loss that he just can't explain. It just doesn't make any sense.

"What were you thinking?" she chides, getting a rag, wetting it with the cold water and hands it to him. He takes it with a greatful nod and holds it against the back of his hand. He makes his way over to the table that's way too big for just five people. The whole place was just too big for five people. He remembers something about a school. But couldn't remember thinking it or saying anything about it himself. And he had no idea how he could run a school by himself in the first place.

He could barely tollerate caring for two teenagers and two almost adults as it was. Raven pretty much takes care of herself and spends a lot of time with Hank, who at least can take pretty much care of himself too. It was Alex and Sean that gets under his skin sometimes.

He pinches the bridge of his nose and rest his chin in his hands as he looks back at Raven and asks, "Do you ever get the feeling that we're missing something? Something important."

She stars at him as if he was losing it, but he knew he wasn't. Something was not right about this whole thing. He could feel it.

"No. It's always just been the five of us. You, me, Hank, Alex and Sean. Why would there be something missing?"

Erik narrows his eyes at her and snaps, "Because I feel it Raven. There's something missing. Someone. I just can't remember, but I can feel it."

"I think you're finally losing it. There's no one missing," she argues, but he ignores her, knowing she wouldn't believe him, no matter how hard he tries to convice her. She looks at him with worry a moment longer then turns around and heads back to her room or somewhere. He doesn't really care what she does.

He is exploring the mansion more when he comes across it, a room that looks like it's been used before, recently even. Cloths were in the closet and chest dwarer. The bed looks like it had been made in a hurry. He sits on the bed and that's when he sees it on the nightstand. He reaches over, picking it up and stares at the photo. It was picture of Raven and a younger man, leaning happily against her with the same stunning blue eyes he saw in his dreams and imagination. Here he finally has his proof that he isn't making it up or going crazy and hops off the bed.

He has to find Raven.

He finds her in the living room,sitting on the couch and shoves the picture frame in her hands. She jumps in surprise, holding the picture and stares up at him in shock. "What's this?" she asks, looking down at the picture and opens her mouth in shock.

"Proof. It's him. I know it is. We have to find him."

"I don't know him," she argues, touching the face of the man in the photo as if she wasn't quite so sure of that anymore. But it lasted only a second before she scowls at it.

"I think you do. You just can't remember like me. Somehow our memories of him have been erased. But for some reason I can still feel it." Raven glares back up at him and shoves the picture in his hands.

"I don't know him," she repeats, folding her arms against her chest stubborningly.

"This says otherwise," he points out, holding up the picture, waving it accusingly in front of her face.

"It says nothing. I don't know who he is. Someone could've manipulated a picture of me and planted it here somehow for all I know." Erik couldn't believe her unwillingness to even consider the possibility that there memories of this man has been erased and glares at her.

"What would someone possibly have to gain from that?" he probes, trying to get her to understand. This man who is missing from their lives is important. They need him._ 'I need him.'_

"I don't know. But the fact remains that I don't know him. And that one picture alone isn't enough to convince me otherwise."

"But what about the room I found it in?"

She blinks, "Room?"

Erik nods then shows her the room he had found the picture. She looks around, still looking skeptical.

"This still proves nothing."

Erik throws his hands up in the air, getting frustrated with her. _'Why can't she belive me?'_

"How can you say that? Who do all these cloths belong too?"

"They could've been here for years."

"They're still clean."

Raven shakes her head at him, "Erik I don't know why you insist this mystery man of yours exists? But you're starting to scare me."

Erik couldn't believe she was fighting this so hard and comes to the conclusion that whoever erased their memories must have tried to make them not want to remember as well. It was the only explanation for Raven's constant reluctance.

"Fine," he snaps. "If you arn't willing to help me? Then I'll just have to find someone who will." He still had Alex, Sean and Hank to try and convince after all. He knew Hank would be at least willing to listen to him with more of an open mind.

"Good luck with that," she says sarcastically and walks out of the room. He glares after her, taking one last look around the room before walking out himself and starts his search for Hank.

**TBC**

PLEASE REVIEW and let me know what you think so far! **PLEASE!**


	2. Remember

**Chapter Two**:Remember

He finds Hank in his room, who eyes him curiously when he opens the door at his knocking. Hank then opens the door all the way for him to enter. He nods at him, walking past the scientist and then turns around to face him. He hands Hank the picture who blinks down at it curiously. "Who's that?"

Erik resists the urge to roll his eyes.

"That is someone we have to find. Somehow our memories of him have been erased. I need your help to find him Hank?"

Hank sinply stares at him, much like Raven had. He grits his teeth, clenching his fists against his sides. "I'm not crazy! I know he's important to us. '_Especially me,' _he adds silently. "We need him. We have to find him!"

"Okay, lets say for the sake of argument that I believe you Erik. How do we even begin to search for him? We have no idea of who or where he is," Hank says calmly, handing him back the picture and he clutches it against his chest like a lifeline. At least Hank wasn't dismissing the possibility as quickly as Raven had. He feels his heart beating fast and tries to calm it down, taking a few deep breaths.

"All right. You have a point there. We don't have much to go on. But I know he's out there somewhere. I feel it," he tries to explain, but can't quite understand it himself, so how can he make anyone else understand.

"You... feel it?" Hank eyes him like he's never seen him before and he glares back at him.

"I am capable of feeling. I just don't always show it. You know that."

Hank sighes, nodding.

"I'm sorry Erik. But I don't think I can help you. Not until you have more for us to go on."

Erik tries not to glower at Hank. At least the scientist was willing to help if he had more for them to go on. But still, the doubt from him hurt. He knew it shouldn't, but it does. He nods, stepping past Hank and out the door.

'_Why are you fighting this?' he probes, sitting down next to Charles on the Telepaths' bed, who looks sideways at him with a slight blush and lowers his eyes shyly. Erik's lust and desire for the man just rises at that look. _

_"Because I am not your peace," the Telepath says simply before looking away and Erik reaches out with two fingers, turning his chin then lifts it so that he was meeting his gaze. _

_"Says who?" He's slowly inches downward to brush his lips against those amazingly too red ones. Charles just stares up at him, apparently not having an answer for that question. _

_"I don't know. But..." He silences him with a kiss, pushing him on his back against the sheets and stakes his claim. Charles was his and no one is going to take him away. _

Erik pauses in the hallway as he's bombarded with more memories.

_They are outside under a tree with Erik leaning back against the trunk of it and Charles sits in his lap, leaning back against his chest. They look towards the mansion that seems to glow like a peacon of light and hope with the sunlight shining down on it. Charles has a far away look in eyes and Erik can't help but press a soft kiss against his temple affectionatly from the side. _

_"Imagine it Erik. The school full of children running around, happily, safe and secure from those who want to hurt them. At least until peaceful co-existance with the humans is a reality," his lover says dreamily. _

_Erik doesn't have the heart right then to chastise him for his niaveness. He doesn't believe co-existence with the humans will be possible. They will always fear them and want to hurt them. Charles already knows how he feels about this, so he doesn't see the point in arguing about it. He rests his chin on top of Charles' head and holds him close._

_"You're such a dreamer arn't you?" _

_Charles twists in his lap so that he's straddling his hips and gazez happily up into his eyes, smiling up at him like he was the most important thing in the world. Erik's breath is taken away. How can anyone's eyes be so blue and lips so red and just so memorizing? He will always wonder, he supposes._

_"You wouldn't love me as much if I wasn't," his boyfriend answers, lacing his arms around his neck. Charles curls his fingers in his hair, bringing his head down so that he can press their lips together and kiss him like there was no tomarrow. Erik wants to argue. Wants to assure Charles that he would love him no matter what he believes in. But he couldn't, because it was probably true. Most likely true. _

The picture slips from Erik's fingers, the glass shattering as it crashes against the floor. He burries his face in his hands, feeling tears stinging his eyes, as another memory hits him like a punch in the gut.

_It was the night before Shaw and the beach. When everything went to hell. There was a fight. A pointless fight that Erik regrets right after. Charles says I love you, waiting for Erik to say it back. But he just couldn't get the words he's never spoken to come out of his mouth. _

_"You know how I feel," he tries to avoid the argument, but Charles wants to hear it. _

_"I know. But it'd still be nice to hear. Even if it's just this once. We both know there's a possibility that not all of us will be coming back from this mission alive." _

_Erik reaches his hands up, gripping Charles shoulders and runs them smoothly up and down his arms until they're once again gripping his shoulders. _

_"That's why I want you to stay here." It comes out more of an order then a plea and Charles narrows his eyes at him. _

_"I'm going. I can't let you face this alone. You need me," Charles argues with determination is his eyes, and Erik was not used to feeling anger at him from his lover. It unsettles him. _

_"I do need you. I need you to be safe and out of harms way. I need something to look foreward to if I'm to survive this." He wants Charles to understand that he doesn't think he could consintrate on finding and killing Shaw with Charles' life in jeoperdy. _

_"I'm going. You can't make me stay behind. I'll find a way to follow you. You know I will." _

_Erik tightens his grip on his shoulders, easing it when Charles winces. He feels immediately guilty, but the fear and rage at the thought of losing his lover is making him lose control of his emotions and actions. _

_"Fine then," he snaps, yanking his hands back and throws them frustratingly up in the air. "Come if you want. Come and be damned!" He then turns around practically stomping his way childishly out the door. He slams it shut behing him with his power. He can feel Charles withdrawing from his mind and tries not to collapse from despair and pain of the loss. _

Erik falls to the floor and starts to cry. How could he have been so stupid and selfish? All Charles had wanted was three damn fucking words. Why couldn't he have said them? Maybe Charles would've stayed behind if he had given him what he'd wanted and Erik wouldn't have almost gotten him killed. Would've never forgotten him and lost him.

_"You are never to leave my sight," he says once they step out of the plane._

_"You know I'm perfectly capable of taking care of myself," Charles argues back and Erik glares. _

_"You will do as I say," he seeths, halting his steps and takes hold of Charles by the elbow. He pulls him closer so that their noses are almost touching and dares him with his eyes to challenge him. _

_"You're hurting me," Charles cries, trying to yank back his arm. Erik blinks, not believing his own actions and quickly lets go. Charles glares at him, massaging his elbow. Erik attempts to hug him for some form of comfort. There was no law against two men hugging in the open after all._

_"You see now why I was fighting this from the begining?" Charles says simply, but doesn't try to walk away again. He doesn't say anything either and takes his place accordingly by Erik's side as if trying to prove a point. _

_"I just want you to be safe."_

Charles bites his bottom lip still not saying anything. The silence was eating away at him.

_"I know," was all he got in reply and Erik sighs. _

_"You know how I feel?" _

_"I know Erik," Charles raises his voice a little. _

_"Lets go find Shaw then." _

_They then begin their search for Shaw and Erik glances sideways occasionally towards his lover just to make sure he's still there by his side and unharmed. _

Erik manages to stop crying by this point, but the anguish was now being replaced with rage and hatered at himself for his own foolish behavior towards Charles.

How could he have fucking forgotten? How could he have treated the man he loved so horribly wong? It was like he had been possessed then. He had to find Charles and plead for his forgiveness. He would give anything for Charles to love him the way he once did again. He was lost without him.

_'Charles where are you?'_

Hopefully he'll remember where they had lost him soon.

TBC

PLEASE REVIEW!


	3. Small mercies

**A/N: **Hey guys. Here's chap three. I appolgize if it seems kind of boring. But I'm trying to build plot. So yeah. Hope you enjoy! And feedback is greatly appreciated!:)

**Chapter Three**:Small mercies

Erik picks up the dropped picture and now broken photo frame, carefully extracting the photo from it. He tries to be careful not to cut himself with the sharp edges of the glass. He's already had one minor injury today. He really didn't want another. He walks back to the kitchen, tossing away the frame in the garbage. He then walks back to the coffee pot, heating the liquid back up. After pouring himself another cup that he actually might get to drink this time, he walks back over to the table. He sets the cup down first before pulling out the chair, and sits down himself. He holds the picture of Charles and Raven out in front of him with one hand, while reaching out with his fingers to touch the mans face with the other.

He remembers his name now. Charles Francis Xavier. And that they had been lovers. But the rest was already slipping away again. He Just knows that he loves him and that the man is a stubborn niave bastered, but you couldn't help but love and admire him anyway. Most of the time. He needs to find another frame for it. It's possibly the only picture he has of his 'Once Upon a Time and He Hopes Will Be Again' lover. He traces the mans' cheek, biting his botton lip before folding it up. He stuff it back into his bockett where he will keep it safe until finds a new home for it.

He was about to pick up his coffee and have a sip when another memory chose that procise moment to him. Seriously, all he wanted was to finish one damn cup of fucking coffee. Well that and to have Charles back with him again.

_They were in the sub and just found Shaw, Erik keeps an attentive eye on his lover, who attempts to break through the helmet and hold Shaw imobile with his mind. "Awe Erik. So nice to see you again. And you brought a friend too. How lovely," Shaw says, eyeing Charles curiously. "It's the Telepathic one, yes?" Erik steps in front of Charles, blocking him from Shaws' veiw. _

_"You will not look or speak to him," he seeths and Shaw smiles evilly. _

_"A more than a friend then? Even better. But honestly Erik, I didn't think men were your thing." He knew Shaw was only attepting to get under his skin and tries to ignore him. _

_"It's none of your buisness. Leave him out of this." _

_Shaw smirks, stepping closer to them and taunts, "I am not the one who brought him into this situation, my student. You did. You are the one who puts him endanger now. Not me." _

_'Erik I can't reach him. It's the helmet. It's blocking me," Charles says frantically with his mind, pulling his fingers back from his temple, lowing them to his side. Erik glowers at Shaw, reaching out with his arm to block Charles from walking foreward and attempting to do something stupid that will most likely end with getting himself killed. He was no match for Shaw now that he couldn't use his Telepathy against him. _

_"Stay here," he warns, taking a step foreward, only to have Charles reach out and grip his wrist._

_"Erik NO!" his lover pleads, tugging him back towards himself, but he lifs his other hand and removes Charles curled fingers from his rist. _

_"You knew it would come to this. You know I have to kill him," he says the last sentence with his mind, lifting Charles' chin and warning him with his eyes not to interfere unless he tells him so. _

_"I don't want to lose you. Not this way. PLEASE! We'll find another way," Charles practically begs, his eyes starting to water and Erik feels his heart breaking and he kisses him. Slow and tender, trying to show him with his mouth, what he couldn't force himself to say with words. Shaw was their only witness and he didn't give a damn what he thought about it. _

_"You will never lose me Charles. But I have to do this. I can never rest easy until he's no more. I'm sorry," he says with some regret at the hurt look Charles gives him. _

_"I LOVE YOU!" Charles yells in one last attempt to get him to stop. To just stop. He lifts his hand, running his fingers affectionatly through Charles' silky brown locks of hair. _

_"I'm sorry," he says one more time before spinning around and rushes at Shaw, who was taken off guard at the sudden movement. Erik punches him, knocking him unconsious. He stares at the unconsion body of his tormenter laying on the ground, who's nose is bleading and is surely broken. He breaths in and out with satisfaction before reaching down and removes the helmet, tossing it aside. "Hold him Charles. Make sure he doesn't wake up," he orders, looking back towards his lover. Charles hesitates before lifting two fingers and works his magic. Erik's heart does a little flip flop. He then turns his attention back down at Shaw as he removes the coin from his pocket, hovering above the monsters' head and uses his own magic to slowly lower it and dig it into his skull. _

_He hears a gasp from Charles, but ignores it for the time being. One thing mattered to him at this moment and one thing only. And that was killing Shaw. He will comfort his lover after. And give him everything after this is done and over with. _

_The coin embeds intself all the way in now. Shaw's face twitches a little before going slack again. Erik reaches out to feel his pulse to make absolutely sure he's dead. He sighs with relief when there wasn't one. There's thump of someone hitting the ground behind him. He spins sharply around to see Charles laying on his his side, curling into himself. _

_"CHARLES?" he cries, rushing over to his fallen lover and kneels down next to him. "It's alright now. It's over. We can go home." He lifts Charles head onto his lap, bending down to press their lips together for triumphant kiss. _

_"We still have to stop the Russian ships from crossing the border and starting World War three," Charles reminds, wrapping his arms tightly around his thigh and nuzzling his cheek against it. Erik strokes his hair fondly. Even completely drained of energy, Charles is commited to seeing this mission through to the end. _

_"Can you even stand?" he probed, helping lift Charles into a sitting possition so that they were facing each other. _

_"In a moment. Holding Shaw and making sure he stays unconsious took a lot out of me, my friend. At least you made it so he couldn't feel his death as much. Thank you for that." He could tell Charles was holding something back, but didn't want to spoil the reunion with another fight. _

_"Small mercies." He really doesn't know why he knocked the man unconsious when he had wanted him to be awake, experiancing as much pain as possible. A part of him feels it was because of Charles presence that he uncounsiously knocked him out instead. But at least he's dead now and he can attempt to move on and build a new life with Charles, Raven and the kids. But most importantly Charles. That's all that matters. _

_They sit there in the aftermath in silence a moment just holding each other until Charles was able to stand on his own two feet again. Erik helps him up, kissing him one more time before going to phase two of the mission. Preventing the Third World War. _

Erik drops his head in arms on the table, breathing in and out deeply. His heart was beating fast and painfully in his chest again. It ached so much. He now remembers Charles' name, that he was his lover and that he could've been the one to erase all their memories of his person because Charles Francis fucking Xavier is the worlds most power Telepath. Why would he do this to them? To him? How could he? He growls angrilly now, jumping from his chair, almost knocking his beverage off of the table. But he doesn't care about that now.

All he cares about now is finding Charles and knocking some sense into him and find out why did this in the first place. A hand grips his shoulder from behind and he spins around, instictively raising his fist in self defense, bout lowers it when he sees a concerned Sean and slightly amused Alex. "You okay Erik? This isn't about your mystery man is it?" the latter probes, folding his arms against his chest. Erik narrows his eyes. Of course Raven would have gone to them first and try to convince them he was crazy and to pay him no attention. He doesn't suspect Hank at all becuase it just wasn't in the mans' nature to gossip behind someone elses back. Much less a friends.

"I don't know what Raven's told you. But I'm not crazy! And it doesn't seem like any one of you is going to believe me. So why bother trying to convice you two. It looks like I'll just have to find him by myself," he snaps, side stepping Alex in an attempt to leave the kitchen. His coffee once again untouched and forgotten.

"Raven said there was a picture of himself and her together. Can we see it?" Sean probes, coming to stand besides Alex as Erik turns back around and narrows his eyes at them. He doesn't think showing them will do any good, but he takes the picture out of his pocket anyway. He unfolds it and holds it up for them to see. They step closer and eye the picture curiously. Alex chuckles. Erik glares at him, not seeing what was so damn funny about this situation at all.

"I can see why you'd become obsessed Erik. Are those eyes for real?" Alex is aweing at the picture now and Erik quickly folds it back up, securing it in his pocket once more. They've seen enough. Especially Alex. He didn't want the kid getting any bright ideas. Charles was his damn it. Alex just laughs some more.

"Dude, chill! I'm just messing with you. I'm not interested in guys whatsoever. He's all yours. But god, even I can see the appeal of those blue eyes. Hopefully I'll find a girl with those." Alex sighs dreamily while sitting on the table. Charles wouldn't have liked that, but would've let it go, he knew his lover was a big softie at heart. Erik wasn't as forgiving though.

"Don't sit on the table. Learn some manners and respect of other peoples property," he snaps and Alex jumps off the table as if Erik had personally kicked him off it.

"Woah dude! Where'd that come from? This happens to be our property," Sean interupts, patting Alex on the shoulder to try and comfort him from Erik's verbal wounding.

"Where's the proof? I don't exactly remember perchasing it. Apparently I don't remember a lot of things. Just like the rest of you don't. But I'm the only one who seems to want to remember." Well, Hank was at least willing to consider the possibility. Raven thought he was crazy. And it looks like Alex and Sean seem to think it's all some kind of big joke.

Alex rolls his eyes in a duh manner and retorts, "It's Ravens'. She found it as a kid and used it as a hide out. Don't you remember her telling us about how lonely her life was growing up?"

"You're telling me she lived in this huge place all by herself? How did she get the money for food, for cloths. How did she even survive alone?"

"You survived on your own? We all survived. Well, except Sean, who's family actually cared for him. And Hank had his job," Alex points out. Erik wants nothing more than to hit him. Something to relieve the frustration, stress and heartache he was feeling. He spins around and storms out of the kitchen before he did something he knew he would regret later.

**TBC**

**PLEASE REVIEW! They really mean a lot to me:)**


	4. Welcome to the Brotherhood!

**A/N**:WARNING:Main characters death this chapter. Not Erik, Charles, Raven, Hank, Alex or Sean though. Apparently this story and this pairing is all I can think about lately!:) Hope you all enjoy this chapter.

**Chapter Four**:Welcome to the Brotherhood!

Erik makes his way back to the room he knew must've been Charles', letting himself in and walks over to the bed. He lays himself down on it, resting his head on one of the pillows that still carry a distant but very familier scent. He turns on his back while grabbing the pillow and hugs it against his chest like it was Charles himself. He stares up at the celing with a blank stare, and trying to will the memories to come to him. He had to remember where they had left Charles behind so that he could go get him back.

_They were on the beach and Erik was aiming the missiles twards the American and Russian subs. Charles could've stopped him at anytime, but he didn't. This is what trust was really made of, he knew. Charles trusted him and he was betraying that trust. But he wasn't about to let the humans get away with trying to kill them. Kill Charles._

"GIVE ME ONE GOOD REASON WHY I SHOULD STOP?" he hollers, preparing to fire them back in the direction from which they came. Instead of getting an answer, he gets an arm full of Charles and Charles' lips pressing pleadingly against his instead. It's all he could do not to let his consintration slip and let his control on the missiles go.

"For me Erik. Just stop for me. I'll consider it wedding gift. Let them go. Please!" Erik stares into the pleading eyes of Charles, hesitating only a moment before letting go of the missiles and forcing them to crash and blow up into each other instead. He could deny his lover nothing, it would appear. He watches them destroy each other then turns his attention back down at Charles, who was smiling and looks proud of him. "Thank you, my husband." Charles then wraps his arms his neck, pulling his head down for a kiss.

_A shot is fired, Charles cries out, arching his back before doubling over and Erik catches him, lowering him to the ground. Erik's frantic mind takes a moment to register what's just happened as he pulls a wounded Charles up onto his lap and lifts his head, so that he could see his eyes. Making sure they were still open. He looks around for the one who fired the shot and found Moira pointing her gun at them. She had a sad and regretful expression on her face, like she couldn't believe her own actions, but he didn't give a damn. She had just shot Charles. Betraying their trust in her. He will let the other humans live. But not her. _

_"YOU DID THIS!" he snarles, raising his hand and ususes the neckless around her neck to choke her to death. _

_"Erik don't," Charles gasps in pain, only fulling Erik's anger. _

_"It's what they wanted Charles. To turn us against each other. I tried to warn you. Well, I'm not going to let them succeed. I spared the others lives for you, but not hers Charles. She's betrayed our trust. It's more than she desearves." _

_With one swift movement of his hand the chain twist in such a way that breaks her neck and she falls to the ground, body lifeless. Charles turns his face away and Erik could see tears escaping them and falling down his cheek. _

_"Don't cry for her Charles. She wasn't worthy of it." He couldn't believe Charles was crying for someone who just tried to kill him. He holds Charles close as he slowly removes the bullet. At least he knew Charles would live, for now. _

_"I want you by my side. We both want the same thing," he says it like a proposal and Charles stares sadly up into his eyes. _

_"Oh my friend. I'm sorry. But we do not," Charles rejects him and his eyes fall shut. _

_"CHARLES!" He shakes him, trying to get him to open his eyes again. But he doesn't and Erik clutches him against his chest. He knew Charles was only passed out, but that doesn't make his fear any less bearable. He slowly picks him up, cradling him in his arms like a fragile doll as he walks over to where Angel, Riptide and Azazel were standing. They look as lost as Erik felt. He steps in front of the Teleportor, who looks down at the uncounsious body of his lover in his arms. _

_"Oh my god CHARLES," Raven shouts, seeming to come out of her shock and rushes over to them, looking frantically down at her brother and runs her fingers through his hair._

"Raven I need you to go back and watch over the others. I have to get Charles to a hospital. The rest of you will follow shortly. That is..." he puased, turning back to look at Azazel continuing. "If you'll help me get him there? Will you?" Charles was fine for the moment. But if they didn't get him to a hospital soon, he could possibly bleed to death. And he couldn't let that happen. It would destroy him. Azazel hesitates, but then nods, reaching for Erik's arm and wraps his demon fingers around his wrist. Erik's stomach churns when they dissapear with a pop and a cloud of black smoke.

It takes Erik a moment to realize he's crying. He wipes his tears hastily away, pushing himself up into a sitting posistion. No wonder Charles had most likely been the one to wipe their memories of his person from their minds. Erik had killed his friend. He snorts. Why Charles still considers her a friend after she had shot him, he will never know. But now he knew. Charles was possibly afraid of him and wanted to get away from him. It hurt like hell, that he was the one who put the fear of him in Charles. But Moira got what she desearved and he wasn't going to appologize for killing her.

He pushes himself up off the bed, exiting the bedroom with a new determination in his stride. He suddenly knew what he has to do. It was possibly the only way he could find Charles if he couldn't remember himself. And he was getting tired of waiting for the memories to come to him. He makes his way towards his own bedroom and starts packing his suitcase. Just a new change of cloths and a pad of paper and pen and a map, just in case. He writes a letter to Raven and the kids to tell them he was going to be gone awhile. He doesn't tell them the specifics because they didn't need to know. But he assumes they would think he left to try find Charles by himself, which was partially the truth.

He waits until nightfall when everyone else is asleep before setting the letter on his nightstand. He grabs the suitcase from the floor besides the bed before leaving the room and manages to leave the mansion without anyone notincing and trying to stop him.

He raises his hand, managing to blow the door where the holding cell the CIA were keeping Emma in with ease. Humans were so very pratictable. It was easy to break through their metal beariers and turn their own weopons agianst them. The smart ones who actually dropped their weopons and raised their hands in surrender once they saw what he did to the first one who tried to fire at him, he let live. He wants as less blood on his hands as possible, knowing Charles wouldn't want him to try and find him this way.

He suddenly wishes he had the helmet Shaw had worn, but it seems that he and Emma Frost were just going to have to trust each other. He knew she was no where near Charles level but somehow that was of little comfort. He was safe within the cell, but who knows about outside of it.

He steps in the cell and walks in front of the female Telepath pacing back and forth like a lion cornering it's prey. "I need your help."

She narrows her eyes at him, "Why should I help you? Where's your Telepathic friend?"

He glares warningly at her.

"That's why I need your help. He's erased mine and my friends memories of him and I can't remember where I lost him. I know it's a hospital. But I don't know which one. I need your help to locate him."

She struggles against her bonds for show, "Again I ask; Why should I help you? I don't care about your Telepathic friend one way of the other."

Erik growls, leaning foreward threatingly.

"Help me find him. Then you're free to go wherever you want to or join me. I don't care. I just have to find him."

Understanding seem to light her eyes and she smiles cruly back at him.

"What if I can't find him for you? What if he's dead?"

"Then I'll still let you go free. My battle is with the humans. Not you."

"Your friend doesn't approve?"

"Charles is niave and too optimistic. He doesn't know the threat the humans pose to us. He and his kids need protection. It's up to us to show them the way..." he pauses waving his hand, releasing Emma's bonds. She cradles her wrist as she stands up to face him and he finishes, reaching out for her hand. "Are you with me?"

She hesitates, but in the end excepts his hand.

"Welcome to the Brotherhood!"

**TBC**

**A/N: **Okay, please don't hate me for killing off Moira! I have nothing against her and was actually rooting for her and Charles to get together at first until I saw the amazing chemistry between Charles & Erik. *Sighs dramatically*.

**PLEASE REVIEW! **


	5. I gotta find you

**A/N:**_So this chapters mostly about Erik and Emma trying to learn to get along with each other. Though there are a couple of Charles/Erik scenes. I know that Emma's usually portrayed as the 'B' of the bunch. But I'm trying to make her a little more reasonable and understanding in this fic. I actually like her and think she could be so much more. Like Erik. Lol! _

**Chapter Five**: I gotta find you

Erik and Emma are long gone from the CIA compound before the calvery arrives and they finally stop to catch their breath, huddling behind some bushes. "Can you try locating him now?" he probes, still keeping a look out for anyone that might be following them. He looks over his shoulder breifly to see her closing her eyes in an attempt to consintrate. She eventually sighs, giving up and opens her eyes.

"Your lovers' mind is strong surgar. I thought I found him for second, but then he blocked me. Wherever he is, he ovbiously doesn't want to be found."

Erik growls, punching the ground, since it wouldn't help any if he took his frustration out on the Telepath. _'Wait! Did she just call Charles my lover?'_

"Stay the hell out of my head!" he snarles, curling his fist together in the grass. Emma just rolls her eyes at him.

"Oh please! I've seen minds more interesting then yours surgar. I had to know if you were telling the truth and could be trusted."

Erik's still not happy about her reading his mind, but she does have a point there, he supposes. "And?"

"I'm still here am I not?" she simply answers as if it should've been obvious.

"Just stay out of my head from now on alright? I know from Charles that you can't help but pick up stray thoughts when others are thinking too loudly, so I'll try not to hold that against you." He wants to build trust with the first member of his Brotherhood and so far it was proving quite difficult.

"I'll try my best surgar," she answers, closing her eyes and tries to consintrate on finding Charles again. Erik glares at her, but sighs, knowing that it's going to have to be good enough.

While Emma's still trying to locate Charles, another memory hits Erik.

_They are at the hospital, but since it's just a memory, Erik can't look around to see which one and he wasn't really paying attention the first time. He was too focused on just getting Charles medical attention. He hollers for someone to help him as soon as Azazel drops them off, dissapearing as soon as he did. Nurses who thankfully didn't see anything come running. They pull Charles from Eriks arms and lay him on a gourney, trying to gather information on what happened to him from Erik. _

_Erik doesn't tell them the whole truth, because they didn't need to know. Just tells them it was an accident. "Your friend is going to require surgery. I'm aftraid you're going to have to have to wait in the lounge room Sir." The man with the 'Doctor's Jared Harrison' tag on it says, pointing the way towards the room mentioned. Erik narrows his eyes, hating to leave Charles in the hands of nurses and doctors, but knew that they were the only ones who could help him right now. _

_So he goes to the lounge room and sits down in one of the free chairs, burrying his head in hands. "God help these humans if something happend to Charles. He could possibly tear the place appart and he really didn't want to hurt or kill any of them right now because that's not what Charles would've wanted and they've done nothing to desearve it, for now. _

"I've made contact again," Emma's voice distrupts his thoughts and he jumps slightly in surprise before turning in her direction with new found hope. "He's fighting me."

"Tell him not to fight. That I'm sorry for scaring him. But not for killing McTaggert. I did it out of love. That more than anything, I want him back."

She raises her eyebrows at him, but closes her eyes again, looking like she's relaying the message.

"He says he doesn't know how you remember him and that he forgives you, but to let him go."

Erik's heart beats painfully fast in his chest and he clenches his fists at his sides. "Tell him I can't. I'll search the entire globe for him if I have to. It'll make things much easier for me if he just tells us where he is now."

"He's laughing at you, but says he's sorry and goodbye Erik."

"Tell him don't go. I need him. To come back to me. That I love him and will never let anyone hurt him again. He's safer with me looking out for him and he keeps me from completely going mad."

Erik's desperately clinging for reasons that might get Charles to tell them where he is. If they don't find him soon, there's no telling what he might do, but it won't be pretty.

"He says you'd never say that and that he can take care of himself. He doesn't want your pity."

"It'S NOT PITY! IT'S LOVE!" he shouts, glaring at Emma as if she were Charles himself sitting beside him.

She gives him a strange look, but relays the message anyway.

"He says goodbye. I've lost contact."

Erik's screaming _"NOOO!" _inside. His entire being going numb. Emma just smirks at him, looking quite pleased with herself. Erik somehow manages not to punch that smug look on her face.

"Don't lose your mind yet surger. While you two were having your lovers quarl, I zoomed in on his location. I may not be as powerful as your precious, yet. But I like to think that I'm pretty close." Erik's heart skips a beat, unsure wheather or not he believes her, but wanting too.

"You know where he is?"

She nods.

"He's at a hospital still not far from here. You really could've found him eventually on your own you know?"

Erik just shrugs and replies, "It was easier this way. And don't tell me you're not thrilled as hell to be out of that damn prison?"

She smiles a little back, "I am. But don't come crying to me when your lover gives you the lecture of a lifetime for breaking me out. He's really pissed about it. He doesn't trust me."

Erik sighs, he still doesn't trust her. But he wants to. They need her, even if Charles doesn't realize it yet. But Charles was the forgiving type and he just knew that they'll eventually warm up to each other.

"He'll get over it," he says, making sure the coast was clear before he stands up and waves a hand for her to lead the way. "Ladies first." She raises her eyebrows at him, but follows his orders and he trails after her, his heart still beating painfully, yet hopefully fast with the thought of actually seeing Charles again. But he wasn't about to turn his back on the Diomond Lady for awhile yet.

_"I'm coming for you Charles and I'm never going to let you out of my sight again." _

**TBC**

**PLEASE REVIEW!** They really are appreciated!:)


	6. Come home with me

**Chapter Six:** Come home with me

Erik follows Emma inside the hospital she had located Charles in and then they walk up to the front desk.

"Can I help you?" a nurse assistant with bright green eyes and brownish hair asks, looking up at them.

"We're here to see a Charles Francis Xavier."

She nods, staring to search the name through the computer for his file and Erik glares at her getting impatient. He didn't know how much longer he could wait to see his lover again.

"Are you family?"

Emma snorts and Erik glares at her warningly answering, "We're friends."

"I see," she says and looks like she's found his file. "He's still in fragile condition and the Doctor's reluctant of him having visitors unless it's important."

Erik manages to refrain himself from growling at her. '_Fragile condition_?'

"It is important. I have to see him. Please!"

She sighs, "I suppose I can allow one of you to see him. But the other will have to wait outside the room."

Erik didn't like having to leave Emma alone. But if it was the price he must pay to see Charles again then so be it. He nods.

"We understand. Can you take me to him now?"

She nods, putting someone else in charge until she gets back and gets up to show them to Charles' room.

"You said he was in fragile condition. What kind of condition are we talking about here?" he probes, walking side by side with the nurse. She's silent until they reach the door and he could feel a familiar, but distant tug through and his hands started to shake with anticipation of seeing him again.

"The Doctors' did everything they could. But I'm afraid he may never be able to walk again Sir. And he's taking it rather badly."

'_Well of course he is,' _Erik was tempted to snap, but didn't. '_Charles may never walk again' _Erik wanted to scream at the unfairness of it all. And it was all McTaggert's fault. Erik was suddenly glad he'd killed her while he could.

"Just try not to upset him," she says, opening the door for him. And he gave Emma a look which says, _'Don't you dare cause any trouble while I'm gone_.' Emma simply glares back, nodding her answer. He then makes his way inside the room, bracing himself for what he will see.

There's Charles, with his back pressed up against the headboard, comforted with pillows, stairing up at the cieling, looking completely lost and sniffs. "I told you to let me go."

Erik's heart breaks at seeing the emptiness of those once filled with life and happiness blue eyes. "Since when do I ever follow your orders?" he probes, walking up to the edge of the bed and reaches out for his hand. Charles sighes, reaching for his as well. Erik laces their fingers together. "Are you in any pain?" Charles shook his head, tears misting over his eyes.

"I can't feel anything from the waist down. I don't think I'll ever get used to it. I didn't want you or the others to see me like this again. You're all far better off without a cripple holding you back."

Erik couldn't believe what he was hearing and felt anger rise and despite what the nurse said about upsetting him growled, "You really think that? Charles, we're lost without you. Even if the others can't remember you yet, I can tell they're not the same. I know I'm not. We need you back Charles. I need you back."

Charles looks like he's trying really hard to not to burst into tears and Erik almost feels sorry for raising his voice at him. But damn it, he's gone through all this trouble to find Charles and he wasn't going to return to the mansion without him.

"You broke Miss Frost out of her cell and brought her here?" Charles says with a glare, trying to change the subject. Erik glares back.

"You know she's helped me find you and she's part of the Brotherhood now," he explains, pearching himself against the edge of the bed, so he could be closer to Charles.

"The Brotherhood?"

Erik sighs, knowing Charles wasn't going to like it. But it must be done to ensure protection for mutants everywhere.

He explains, "I'm building a team for those of us who want mutant-domination over humans. It's the only way we can make sure of our safety Charles. I know you don't like it. But it must be done."

Charles lets go of his hand and sinks down into the covers.

"What about my quest for mutant-human peaceful coexistence? Do my hopes and desires mean so little to you?

"Charles. Don't make this harder then it already is. I can promise you that I'll be just and fair. But that's all. Not all humans are bad, I know that. But even the innocent will fear us."

"And what will you do to them? Lock them away in camps until they don't fear us anymore? Men, woman and children. Is that the kind of future you want for this world? Erik, please listen to me..!" Erik couldn't help it and pulls Charles up for a hug, silencing the pleading Telepath, who then clutches at him like a lifeline.

"Shh, Charles. I know it's hard for you. And it will take awhile if ever. But Just let go of all that. Let me take care of you, your sister and the kids. Just let it go and let yourself be happy and care free. With me again." He ran his palm up and down Charles back trying to sooth his trembling lover.

"I don't think I can. I can't let you kill all those people."

"Forget about them Charles. The ones I do plan on killing arn't worth your sympathy. Just think about yourself and the kids. And me."

"I can't. I feel them in my head all the time when I'm not in control and sometimes even when I am. You have no idea what it means to be a Telepath!" Charles cries, clutching at him even harder. Erik lets him, resting his chin on the top of his head.

"I have some idea. Come home with me," he practically pleads, pulling back and presses a soft kiss against his forehead. Charles looks up into his eyes and Erik despretly wants to press their lips together in reunion but knew he couldn't. He can feel the camera watching them.

"How are Raven and the others?" Charles probes and Erik sighs.

"Come home and see for yourself."

"You killed Moira. I've tried to hate you for it. But I can't," Charles admits, resting the side of his head against Erik.

"She shot you. And could've killed you. What'd you expect me to do? Let her get away with it."

"She was terribly jealous after seeing us...you know. She was not in her right mind. And she felt horrified at herself after she realized what she had done to me. She was trying to aim for you, but I'm afraid I got in the way."

Erik knew the CIA agent had more than a crush on Charles, but that was no excuse for what she had done to them. And still Charles was defending her?

"That's no excuse." He sighs, not wanting to argue anymore. He just wants to take Charles home and take care of him. Get Emma settled in and forget about ever losing Charles in the first place. But he knew this was still far from over.

"No. It's not. But it's a reason. Erik?" Charles says, biting his bottom lip nervously.

"Yes?"

"Take me home."

Erik smiles, standing up from the bed, preparing to get the nurse to fetch the Doctor so they can sign whatever papers they had to and he can finally take Charles home.

"With pleasure. I will return shortly." Not caring about the camera, he reaches out his index and middle finger, lifting Charles chin so that they were gazing at each other and caresses the back of then down his cheek, smiling as it seems to lifts Charles spirit a little. He then turns around, heading to do as he had planned.

**TBC**

**PLEASE REVIEW! **They really mean a lot to me! Hope I made their reunion somewhat believable? Lol!


	7. I need you like a heart needs a beat

**Chapter Seven**:I need you like a heart needs a beat

Erik sits on the edge of Charles bed, holding his hand and draws comforting circles on the top of it. The security people watching them from the camera can think of it however they want to. He doesn't care anymore. He's trying to calm himself down, getting annoyed from having to wait for the Doctor for the last three and a half freeking hours. But he understands that this was a hospital and that they weren't the center of attention here. In a perfect world he and Charles and the people his lover cares about would be, but that's not the case just yet.

"Tell me why I'm agreeing to go home with you again? Oh so impatient one," Charles probes, looking over at him and raises his eyebrows a bit. Erik sighs, knowing that Charles mustive picked up on that stray thought and didn't like it. but was trying not to make a big deal of it.

"Because you love me?" he probes back and Charles smiles a little, then frowns a bit.

"I'm beggining to wonder if it's a enough."

Erik doesn't like where this conversation is going and narrows his eyes, "What do mean?"

Charles lowers his eyes as if feeling pained for what he has to say.

"We're just too different. You and me. We both want different futures for the world. I don' t know if we can make it work."

Erik tries to control his temper at Charles words. _'He isn't changing his mind on me. Is he?'_

"Charles?"

"I love you Erik. A part of me always will. But I think we need some time apart until you find out in your heart what it is you really want."

Erik grips Charles hand a little harder, but not enough to hurt him.

"Are you actually trying to give me an ultimatum Charles?"

Charles smiles but it doesn't reach his eyes as he answers, "I would never do that."

Erik rolls his eyes and replies, "Of course you wouldn't." But he couldn't help but feel that's exactly what Charles was doing. _'The love of my life or my ideals?_ _How could I possibly choose?' _

"You can't ask that of me Charles. I can't choose between you and my ideals. IT'S NOT FAIR!" He can't be losing Charles. Not again. He's just got him back. It's really not fair!

Charles lips tremble a little, "You of all people know that life is rarely fair."

Erik looks down at the latest piece of evidence of that fact in the shape of Charles now useless legs and feels tears prickling his eyes.

"Please Charles! You can't ask me to choose. I can't_. I LOVE YOU!" _he shouts the last sentence in his mind, knowing that Charles will hear it. Charles eyes widen and he lets go of Erik's hand to crawl his fingers up his arm until he's gripping his elbow and squeezes it gently.

"Now you say it. Your timing is as always, impecable, my friend, _my darling_."

Erik cringes at the nickname, but lets Charles get away with it, this time.

_'You don't like it?'_

Erik shakes his head, the hurtful look in Charles blue eyes really wasn't fair. It weakens his resolve the only way Charles knows how. He sighs.

"I like it. Just not all the time okay," he answers, lifing his hand, running his fingers through the locks of Charles still slightly matted hair. He can feel the door nob beggining to turn and draws back his hand, pulling his elbow free from Charles light grasp.

"Hello Mr. Xavier. How are you doing this evening? I trust your friend is behaving himself? Your lady friend in the hall looks extreamly impatient and ready to throw a temper tantrum." They both look up towards the end of the bed where the Doctor now stands, staring down at Charles with questioning eyes. Erik's eyes wonders to the name tag and it was the same Jared Harrison he saw in his last memory of the hospital before actually coming here again himself.

He was a tall man about 6 foot four with blond hair and baby blue eyes. But not nearly as brilliantly blue as Charles'. He doesn't think anyone can compete with his lovers eyes.

Charles chuckles at the Doctor's pretty good bedside manner if Erik must say so himself, nodding. "I am and he is. Thank you for asking!" Charles pats his hand affectionately a few times which apparently amuses the Doctor, who smiles brightly down at him.

"Good, good. Otherwise, I might have to sedate him and have your other friend take him home before she runs amok around here."

Charles chuckles again and it's music to Erik's ears. It was too bad this Doctor was human and intent of making fun of him, because Erik can see himself quite liking the man. Charles stops laughing, raising an eybrow at him warningly.

Erik sighs, '_Sorry.' _Charles smiles forgivingly. Erik has a hard time not letting his eyes wonder down to those delicious red lips that he's just itching to capture with his again.

It's been way too long.

"Well, my nurse assistant says that you want to go home?" the Doctor interups, and Charles returns his attention up at him, nodding.

"Yes, please!"

"If you insist. But I'd like to keep you here for at least another few days of observation. Your blood surgar is lower than I'd like it to be and your showing signs of exaustion. You need rest."

"Which I can get at home as easily as I can here?" Charles points out in a questiongly manner.

"I suppose. However, I insist on at least one more night while we get your blood surgar to to normal levels. Then you can go home first thing tomarrow morning. How's that sound?"

"Can my friends' stay?" Charles probes and Erik tries not to glower at the Doctor. They'd drag him away from Charles' bedside over his dead body. He feels slight amusement from Charles and comforting wave in his mind at this.

The Doctor smiles, nodding, "On one condition."

Erik raises his eyebrows curiously at the man and Charles shares a knowing wink with him before looking back at the Doctor. Erik doesn't know weather to be nervous or annoyed. "Yes?"

"Forgive my forewardness. But, your lady friend outside. Is she single?"

"I don't think..."

"As far as I know. Go on..." Charles interupts him, waving the Doctor encouragingly towards the exit with his hands. The man beams, straightening up before marching confidenly out the door.

"...that's a good idea," he finishes his sentence, shaking his head at Charles.

"What? We all desearve a little romance now and then don't we."

"He's human. And it's The Diomond Lady we're talking about here. And did I mention he's human? An annoying Doctor one at that."

"Who also happens to be a good man," Charles argues, resting the side of his head against Erik's shoulder

"And you're hoping he will settle her down; soften her attidute towards humans and join your side?"

Charles gives him the innocent look, and it makes Erik heart do little funny things, like flip all over the place until he's breathing heavilly. He lifts Charles head, pressing their foreheads together.

"I don't want to fight you my friend."

"I don't want to fight you either. Give me another chance Charles. Don't make me beg anymore. It's very unbecoming of me."

Charles chuckles.

"True. But very amusing. You beg like a champ Erik Lehnsherr."

Erik doesn't know whether to be insulted or encouraged by that. He hopes to god it's the latter.

"Is that a yes to US then?"

Charles sighs, pulling away but still keeping eye contact with him.

"It's a maybe. I hate to have to resort to this, but I'm willing to give us trial run. See how it works out. And in the end if it can't work, it still wont change my feelings for you. But at least we'll have given it another try. I do love you Erik. So much."

Erik despises the idea of a tial run. But if it means that Charles is willing to give him another chance, then he'll take whatever he can get. He can't imagine his life without Charles anymore. The past few days without him have been like a waking nightmare.

"And I love you. We'll make this work Charles. I know we can," he says, pulling Charles close, apparently unable to keep his hands off him for more than a few seconds at a time.

"I wish I was as confident as you are, my friend. I really do."

"I'll just have to be confident enough for the both of us then," he replies, trialing a finger caressingly down Charles' cheek and relishing in the fact that it pretty much reduces his Telepath into a pile of goo.

"It did not!" Charles complains, but a shiver he gives not a second later says otherwise.

"Sure. Whatever you say dear," he teases, pulling his finger away. Charles snatches it back and traces a finger on the top of his hand, causing Erik to shiver this time. Well, payback's always a bitch.

"Now who's the one turned into a pile of goo, hmm?" Charles meats his eyes, raising his two fingers to his temple and he can suddenly feel him kissing his lips and neck and feels hands running up down his sides, his arms, his shoulders then down again in his mind. It feels so good, but he wants the real thing and not just an illusion.

"Not yet Charles. I don't want the fake you. I want the real you."

Charles frowns.

"This is the real me. Heart, body, mind and soul. I've been reluctant to show you, but I can give you pleasures you've never even dreamed of. But if you're afraid of me then I..?"

"I'm not. Just not here alright? When we get home and when you're up for it, you can seduce me anyway and all you want to."

Charles beams with excitement in his eyes.

"Prepare to be out moved my friend!"

_"Just checking in surgar. Dont try ripping my head off later for being in your head without permission okay. For the record, the two of you make me sick. Both of you think so loudly and disgustingly. But thank your surgar tush for the present he sent me and that I'll be gentle with it. He's gorgous! I'll be spending the night with him. See you both in the morning when he comes to release Xavier. Bye now," _Erik hears Emma in his mind and can't help but grin, amused.

"What's so funny?"

"Emma says thank you for the present and that she'll see us in the morning."

"See. They're perfect for each other. She's already following him around like a lost puppy."

Erik rolls his eyes at Charles' hopeless romantics' even in his current state.

"What am I ever going to do with you?"

**TBC**

**PLEASE REVIEW! **They really mean a lot to me.

**A/N**: As a couple of you pointed out, I may have jumped the gun with Charles wanting to go home with Erik so quickly in the last chapter. Hopefully this one clears it up a little better?:)


	8. You can go home again

**Chapter eight: **You can go home again

Erik watches Charles gaze up at the mansion from his wheelchair, remembering the first time they had stood here in this spot together, with Raven and the rest of the kids. Only then Charles could walk and this had to be hard for his Telapath. He looks towards Emma on his other side, who is staring up at the mansion herself in awe, her long blond hair blowing slightly with the breeze. Erik can't help but chuckle a little, remembering his own reaction at first glance of the place now. He remembers everything now and he can't bear the thought of losing it again.

His lover raises two fingers against his temple and closes his eyes, focusing.

_'What was he doing?'_

"They remember me now. I didn't want Raven and the children to feel like I was imposing on them." Charles answers his unspoken question after a moment, glancing up at him from the chair briefly. Erik shakes his head down at him, _'Only Charles would feel like an intruder in his own house.' _

Charles then began wheeling himself to the front door. Erik knew better then to help him this time. Charles's insisted that he didn't need help with this when he had tried to help wheel him out of the hospital with the chair they were currently renting the first time until they could buy Charles one of his own, insisting quite loudly that he still had his pride thank you very much. Emma had laughed at Erik's expense and sent a,_ 'You're so whipped surgar,' _through to his mind and he glared murderously at her.

Erik rings the doorbell for Charles and it's Raven who answers, her eyes narrowing dangerously down at Charles and waves a finger down at him too. "You. I just can't believe you! How could you make us forget you like that? Don't you think I'd want to help you through this? YOU'RE MY BROTHER! I have the right to. Oh, I swear to god Charles if you weren't in a wheel chair already I'd put you in one myself," she hollers, stomping her foot angrilly and tears starts filling her eyes.

Charles just smiles up at her, looking completely unfazed by his adopted sister's outburst. He opens his arms out for her in invitation. Raven bursts into tears then, launching herself down into her brothers arms and he runs his fingers comfortingly through her hair. Erik tries not to get jealous at the affection Charles shows her, because it's just Raven and according to Sean and Alex, she's now carrying a torch for Hank and not Charles or himself anymore.

"I will never understand siblings and it's time like this when I feel glad that I'm an only child. If you two are quite finished? I'd like a tour of this quite impressive mansion you've got here." Emma interupts their reunion, and Raven glares up at her as if noticing her presence for the first time.

"What's she doing here?" the shapeshifter probes dangerously, standing up in a defensive stance.

"You'll have to ask Erik. But she's our guest and will be staying here with us, for now," Charles partially answers, looking accusingly twards him and he shrugs.

"She helped me find him Raven. We owe her this much."

"But she worked for Shaw," Raven argues, turning her muderous glare on him now.

"She works for me now," Erik raises his force, feeling uncomprehendable need to defend his, First?'

Raven opens her mouth, but before she could interigate him further, the boys come running. Well, Hank was walking quickly, to the door.

"PROFESSOR!" Alex and Sean shout running to his side and start fussing over him.

"Can we get you anything?" Sean probes.

"How could you do that to us? We wanted to help," Alex probes dissapointingly, looking a little betrayed.

"Boys, give him some breathing space," he orders them, stepping between them and a overwhelming looking Charles. At least Hank had enough sense to keep his distance for now.

They all step aside, allowing Charles through the door first. Erik waves Emma through before he follows after the Telepaths' , hearing the others trailing after him. He feels Raven's glare on his back, ignoring it, for now. They just got home and he doesn't want a fight right now.

Later that afternoon, after getting Emma settled in her own room close to his so that he can keep an eye on her better, he makes his way to Charles's room and knocks. "Charles?" he calles through the door.

"It's open Erik," Charles calls back and he can hear the weariness in his tone worrying him a little. He opens the door and sees Charles turn over on his back to look up at him, smiling a little. "Does Mis. Frost like her new room?"

"Could use more color, but better than a holding cell," he relays the message, walking over to the bed and Charles scoots over for him to lay down. He lays down, scooping Charles up into his arms, with the side of his head resting on his chest.

"Good," Charles says, snuggling more into his side and chest. "I've missed this."

"Me too," Erik replies, smoothing his fingers through Charles's hair. "I do love you Charles. Just don't ever to that again."

"Erik..."

"No Charles," Erik interupts, lifting Charles head up from his chest with two fingers under his chin so that he could meet his eyes. "These past few days have been hell without you. And now that I've got you back, I don't think I can let you go again. It will destroy me. Promise me you wont ever do anything like that again." Charles looks down, looking reluctant and Erik tugs on his chin forcing him to look up again. "Promise me."

"I can't promise you that Erik. But I can promise, that I won't do it to you, my sister or the children ever again. I feel guilty enough for doing it once as it is," Charles replies, sounding so tired.

Erik sighs, cupping Charles' cheeks with the palms of his hands, pulling him up the length of his body for a kiss, a real kiss, finally. He lets his lips linger a little longer before pushing Charles away, but keeping his head cupped between his hands. Charles is blushing and Erik's thrilled that it's because of him.

"I've missed that too," Charles says, capturing his lips again and it really turns Erik on when Charles thinks he's the one taking charge.

**TBC**

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	9. A confrantation with Raven

**Chapter Nine**: A confrantation with Raven

Erik watches Charles sleep, who had fallen asleep, for a who knows how long an afternoon nap, after some slow and sweet making out. They didn't go any further than kissing and caressing. The Doctor was right about one thing. His lover needs rest and Erik was going to make sure that he got it. He trails a finger up and down Charles naked arm drapped across his midsection with a feeling of content and renewed happiness. He leans forewards and pecs at Charles lips with his softly before pulling back and continues to run his hand up and down his arm.

There's a knock at the door. Turning his head slightly, he glares in it's direction. Thankfull that it hadn't awoken Charles, Erik manages to pull himself away from Charles's side and thinks about reaching for his shirt on the nightstand and put it on, but is too lazy to at the moment it would seem. He sighs, thinking whoever was at the door had better have a good reason for risking waking Charles from his much needed slumber.

He makes his way to the door, slowly opening it, carefully, trying not to wake up Charles.

"Charles, I..." Raven pauses, upon seeing that it was Erik who had answered and not her brother. She eyes his bare chest a moment then looks past him towards Charles on the bed then looks back up at him with a smirk and slight blush.

"He's not even back for a day and already you two are it like bunnies in heat."

Erik narrows his eyes, shushing her before making his way out of the room and closes the door slowly behind him. He grabs Raven by the wrist, dragging her a little away from Charles door in case he couldn't get her to keep the noise level down to a whisper.

"What do you want Raven? Charles needs his rest."

She raises an eyebrow at that, folding her arms agains her chest.

"And how exactly is he going to get that when the two of you can't keep your hands of each other?" she probes and Erik waves her off.

"I'm not in the mood for this Raven. Just tell me what you wanted to tell Charles and I'll give him the message when he's up for it," he says, glaring at her warningly. She narrows her eyes, the playfullness gone from them. Her facial expression turning to a scowl.

"I wanted to talk about Emma Frost's invitation. I don't think it's a good idea. I don't trust her and neither do the others. I've talked with them about it. And we think she should find somewhere else to hide from the CIA. Erik, you know having her here is dangerous and a mistake. Why couldn't you have found somewhere else for her to stay? I swear, sometimes you just don't think before you act! I thought Charles would have more sense than that! But it's like he's completely blind where you're concerned."

Erik growls dangerously at Raven for insulting her own brother. Hoping she hasn't woken him from raising her voice like that, he grabs her arm, pulling her close, almost threateningly. "I'm only going to say this once Raven. Mis. Frost, is my responsibility, not Charles'. You've got a problem with her? You come to me from now on about it. Understood?"

Raven glares back, but sighs, nodding and yanks back her arm furiously. "You can't have them both Erik. We all know how you feel about humans. I know my brother and Charles will never see them the way you do."

Erik feels his chest constrict painfully, knowing Raven was right. But that won't stop him from trying. Charles didn't have to join the Brotherhood exactly. As long as he was still with Erik, still loves him, then that was all that matters.

"I don't have to justify myself to you Raven. Now if you'll excuse me, I have see if you've woken your brother from the sleep he most surely needs right now. Oh, and one more thing. Relay what I said about Mis. Frost to the others. Charles doesn't need to be bothered with everything. Especially not now," he ends the conversation, spinning on his heal and makes his way back to Charles, well aware of Raven's glare on his back once again.

He opens the door, shutting it slowly on his way in. He makes his way back to the bed and thankfully finds Charles exactly the way he left him, or so he thought. Sighing with relief, he crawls under the covers next to him, smiling when Charles wraps his arm around his waist again, and snuggling close.

"What'd Raven want?" his lover probes sleepily, eye blinking open just a little.

Erik glares at nothing imparticially, cursing the Shapeshifter's name for waking him.

"I'll tell you later. Go back to sleep. You need it," he ansewers, rubbing a thumb gently back and fourth along his eyebrow. Charles hums delightfully, closing his eyes.

"You don't have to stay. I'm sure you've got other things you need to take care of. What you've got planned for Mis. Frost for example," Charles says, his voice barely a whisper.

"That can wait. Right now my concern is your well being. We'll worry about the rest once you're well enough. Go back to sleep," he says again, and Charles sighs, nodding. His even breathing a few moments later told Erik his Telepath was once again sound asleep.

He continues watching.

**TBC**

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	10. Epologue:Never again

**Epologue**:Never again

Erik wakes up the next morning, spooning Charles from behind. He smiles, kissing his bare shoulder before pulling himself out of bed, careful not to wake his telepath up. He takes a shower and when he walks back into the bedroom again, drying his hair with a towel, Charles is sitting up, back propped up against the headboard. "Hey," he greets his lover, moving back to the bed and peched himself on the edge of it.

Charles smiles a little back, Erik continues, reaching out his hands, and runs then down his arm in a caress, "you hungry?" Charles nods, and Erik helps him off the bed, dress, and then into his wheelchair.

"What if they don't forgive me for what I've done?" Charles probes, and Erik sighs.

"They will Charles," he tries to reassure his lover.

Charles shakes his head, going on about how he doesn't think they will as Erik wheels him out of the room and to the kitchen where the others were already having breakfast. They all look up as they enter and smile in their direction, more at Charles than himself. "Welcome back Professor," Alex says, and Charles smiles back at him.

"Thank you Alex."

Erik nods with approval at Alex for being the first to break the awkward silence, as he wheels Charles to the table and sat in the chair beside him. Charles reaches for his hand, lacing their fingers together. Erik knows it's going to take time for Charles to adjust to his dissability, but he was going to support him the whole way.

Looking at his and Charles students, and Emma attempting to make conversation with Hank and Sean, and then Raven pouring Charles a cup of coffee, Erik couldn't imagine life being any other way. He felt a pair of eyes on him, and turned to see Alex giving him a, 'hurt him again, and you'll regret it' glare before going back to eating his eggs. Erik ignores the glare, knowing that Alex is just protective of those he cares about by nature. He lifts Charles hand, kissing the top of it.

Yes, here is a place he can finally call home. And never again will he allow his own stubborness to put Charles in danger. Raven was right, he couldn't have both the Brotherhood and Charles. If giving up the Brotherhood will allow him to still keep Charles by his side, then it is small price to pay. He still believes in mutant domination without a doubt, but Charles needs him more right now.

**THE END**

Sorry, I know it's short. I just didn't know any other way to end it. But I hope you've all enjoyed the story! Please do let me know if you have? **MERRY** **CHRISTMAS EVERYONE!**


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